a plus-side to being my friend is that you can come to my house in your pajamas and i will not judge you because i will also be in my pajamas
*gets insulted* Nah I don’t care, my mom has said worse to me
every 1st september we joke about getting ready for hogwarts to cover up the very real and very very deep scars of never getting our letters
Straight boys like “lets threesome” but can’t even please one woman
ATTENTION EVERYONE THIS IS THE REALEST SHIT I’VE EVER READ
Just say “sure babe, let’s get another guy in here” and see how quickly they shut down.