I know you asked me not to. But it’s 2 in the morning and I can’t sleep and all I can picture is your face and your arms around me. And while it hurts both of us to think about what could have been, what should have been, I need you to know how much I still think of you. Misery loves company and while I’d do anything to keep you sheltered, I know you’ve always been the only one to understand. I smoked a cigarette at my window and I swear I could feel your touch as I closed my eyes, even if I’ve never felt it. I shut out the lights and let myself go mad with your presence and nothing felt as comforting and as empty at the same time. I gave my whole to you so long ago that now I never seem to be fully able to love anyone so deeply as I love(d) you. And I try. Damn, how many nights have I tried to fall in love. And once in a while, I do. But it’s always so bitter. I would be lying if I said you cross my mind everyday. I’d be lying if I said no other man has felt my love. But I’m not lying when I say that somehow my mind always wanders back to you.
do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to do not read old chat logs of someone you used to be close to
Andei quase 3 anos a agarrar-me a uma ideia que sabia lá bem no fundo que não tinha futuro. A culpa é minha. A culpa sempre foi minha por ter posto esperança em algo que não era real, por muito vívido que estivesse na minha cabeça. Andei a fazer jogos contigo e tu a fazer os teus comigo. De uma forma ou outra, somos ambos criaturas cruéis e não há desculpa para nenhum de nós. Eu sempre soube, apesar de me tentar enganar a mim própria, que nunca iria ser possível. Mas os apaixonados são egoístas. Quero-te ainda hoje para mim, só para mim. E dói-me saber que alguém te pode fazer feliz que não eu.
-Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray (via larmoyante)
-Caio Fernando Abreu. (via fucknumber)